*Frustration*

Isn't it strange how one day you can be just fine, without a care in the world, and the next it feels as if the weight of the world is on your shoulders? Strange and incredibly frustrating! *sigh* Perhaps those "care-free" kind of days are days I simply FORGET whats going on....days where my focus is completely taken by one exciting event. MAYBE those days are when I am better trusting the Lord....I don't know exactly, but those kind of days seem wonderful. And then my mind becomes reoccupied with very confusing thoughts. Lately, I've found myself more and more frustrated with my thoughts....maybe because I'm fighting a somewhat difficult battle with myself and I can't come to a conclusion or a plan of action. I'm fighting FEAR. Fear....what do I fear? Well, honestly, I'm afraid of a lot of things....lighting, cougars, driving in the ice and snow, being alone after dark when in town....but the fear I'm struggling with lately has more to do with the unknown. I won't get too much into detail on the "unknown" right now because its a complicated subject, but it terrifies me! Sometimes I wish things could just always stay the same, but then I suppose the monotony would really get to me. But my goodness it would just be easier! *sigh* But nothing good was ever easy, huh? Or at least that's the way the saying goes. Its just so frustrating, though, fighting with yourself and not being able to come to any conclusions! It seems like I pray and pray, fervently, sincerely, and I just can't find peace one way or the other! Not that I don't think God will lead and guide me if I'm seeking His will, its just difficult not knowing where He's taking me! I suppose that's where faith really comes in? Finding peace purely in the fact that God, indeed, is in control and has a plan much greater than I can fathom. *sigh* I will make every effort to rest in that fact.... Well, that's what I'm thinking on momentarily....don't know if any of that really makes sense....It's just on my mind right now! :P